Facebook can be a great platform. It can help families and friends that are separated by long distances. It can also help us in finding a community of people who think and act the way we do. Good or bad, you can always find someone on Facebook that will agree with you.
There is however a story that we’ve all heard about Facebook. It goes a little something like this: A husband and wife each have their own accounts. They get into an argument or they just drift apart. Someone from the past reached out to them on Facebook. An old girlfriend/boyfriend just wants to say, “Hi!” As the marriage troubles continue, they start to think about and increase the interactions with the old flame. The grass starts to look greener on the other side of the fence. Why put up with the arguing, and a cold house when there is someone telling them how great of a man they are or how beautiful a woman they are. The marriage falls apart and before anyone can figure out what happened, the couple is divorced and the one spouse has moved on to the old flame.
How do we protect ourselves from this? Can we protect ourselves? I absolutely think that we can and we should! Here’s how I’ve protected myself.
1. My wife has my login and password to Facebook.
It may sound like old-timer thinking, but I make sure my wife has my login information. If there is something that I feel I need to hide on Facebook then I more than likely shouldn’t be doing it. I’ve seen too many times where things come back to destroy marriages and families.
2. I don’t scroll through old pictures.
Pictures are the worst. This can be hard, but they are snapshots of the “good times.” Looking through old girl/boyfriend pictures, brings up old memories. We never seem to remember things as they were. There are moments when we romanticize the good things forgetting that we broke up with that person for a reason.
[ctt template=”3″ link=”S6852″ via=”no” ]We never seem to remember things as they were. That person is an ex for a reason…[/ctt]
3. Focus on my marriage.
A lot of times when couples are having a rough time in their marriages they will look for an outlet. Facebook is a horrible outlet. Mostly because the amount of sound advice that you get is outnumbered by the voices that are going to egg you on. Then spouses find themselves pouring their hearts into an old flame. That only leads to establishing connections on a mental and emotional level with someone other than their spouse. When times are tough, we have to work and push through them to keep our marriages intact.
I hope that this helps. What things have you learned and how have you seen Facebook help or hinder marriages?
A relevant “Share Worthy” post. I know of a few marriages that have been devastated and many destroyed by opening a portal to the past.