What we all really want
What makes a good, no a great marriage? At some point we ask ourselves this question. Whether we’re dating, engaged, coming back from our honeymoon or having been married for some years. We want to know what makes marriage work. None of us get married thinking that one day we will get divorced. That’s not the end that we have in mind.
What does happen is that we get married, come home from the honeymoon, have a couple of kids, and things begin to settle into a routine. Is there anything wrong with falling into a routine? Absolutely not, but it’s also not how we have a GREAT Marriage.
Getting from Here to There
How do we go from where we are to where we want to be? That’s a great place to start. We need to have a vision of where we want to go. Ask yourself what do I want my marriage to look like in the next year, five years, ten years, for the rest of our lives. Great marriages don’t just happen by chance. People don’t just fall into a great marriage. Without a vision of where we want to go, we will just drift through life and our marriage. With the divorce rate as high as it is in the United States, it can be hard to find an example of a great marriage. That doesn’t mean it can’t be done, just that you will have to go outside of the people you know for an example.
Pride
Pride has killed many marriages that had the potential to be great marriages. Pride is where we prefer ourselves over our spouse. It can creep in subtly in marriage. We think we have the better idea on how to do something, or we’re used to aspects of the house and family being done a certain way because it makes us feel better. There are so many ways that pride can sneak in. We have to be aware and combat that pride with a heart that is focused on our spouse. If I’m focused on them, then what I want or prefer doesn’t matter. The minute when our marriage focus shifts from us to me, then I’ve let pride in and it has the potential to destroy the marriage that I want to be great.
If we can start with these two things (having a vision and removing pride) and develop them in ourselves, we will be on the road to have a great marriage. We won’t settle for the status quo of what married life should be. We will strive for greater, seek more than #relationshipgoals we see on social media.
