A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. Mignon McLaughlin
Marriage Beliefs
Where do our beliefs about marriage stem from? Most people haven’t thought about this. We might entertain the idea of getting married one day. Or we once we are married we think about what we want our marriage to be. The above quote shows what that person believes about marriage and where their marriage beliefs come from. If you want to know the core of what they believe about marriage just change the topics of conversation and listen to them talk.
What We See
I remember I was on Youtube and a young artist,was being interviewed. The host did just what I described above. They steered the conversation towards marriage and asked this young man what he thought about marriage. His response is what caught my attention. He said that he didn’t believe in the idea of marriage. Not a huge shocker to hear that from someone today. Then he said he didn’t believe in it because he never saw a successful one. He said that there isn’t anyone around him that has stayed married and then if they are they’re not happy. He’s never seen one work. WOW! What a state to live in.
From listening to this young man talk you understand his beliefs about marriage. He doesn’t like it or care for it. His reason, the core of where this comes from for him; he’s never seen a successful one or one where people were happy.
Our beliefs about marriage come from that same place. What we think and believe about marriage come from ideas that were formed when we’re children. So if our parents, aunts and uncles, friends parents argue, talk bad about their spouse or abuse their spouse, we will think that is what marriage is. Our beliefs are in part formed by what we see modeled in front of us.
I wanted to model something different than what my parents had. They were happy but the end was bad and they got divorced. I want and am building something that will last. I want to make sure that my children have a marriage modeled in front of them that is one of a happy, fulfilled and fun marriage.
What are we modeling and what are we seeing?
