Tag: Fatherhood

You Are a Role Model

“Parents are the ultimate role models for children. Every word, movement and action has an effect. No other person or outside force has a greater influence on a child than the parent.” Bob Keeshan

Being a role model is not an easy thing. I want to the superhero to my children. It’s a true statement when you hear that you’re kids grow up fast. While I may want to be the superhero to them, I also have to balance that with being a real role model. We don’t want to try to be the perfect superhero and forget that we’re the real life example in front of our kids.

Be a Role Model

Before my wife and I had children we talked about different things that we wanted to do with them. How we wanted to be an example to them. One of the things that we wanted to do was to go on dates with them. My wife with our son and my daughter with me. While they’re too young now, we look forward to this upcoming time.

Every parent should go on dates with their children. There are benefits that we forget or that we neglect. Father’s should take their daughters out. Mother’s taking out their sons. Here are some of the benefits that I see from doing this.

 

  1. Set the example for how they treat others. Especially for how men or young men treat young women. I refuse to wait until my son is a teenager to then start to show him how to treat a young woman. By showing him how to treat his mother I have to believe that will carry over. When his mother and him go out that will reinforce what I’ve already started in him. He may only be 4 years old now, but I’ve been showing him to open the car door for his mother since he was 2.  Now he rushes to do it before I do]

 

  1. Set the example for [healthy/appropriate interaction. Today’s dating culture has a Netflix and chill mindset. We should be taking opportunities to show our sons and daughters what a real date is like. Going out to do something  fun. We teach them how to go out and have an experience that is more than dinner and movie. They will also do and expect what they see us do. SO, if all they see us do is go out to dinner and movie, then they will expect the same level.

 

  1. Teach them how to have communicate. The more we involve ourselves with social media and the trend that we’re seeing where everything is moving online, there is a lost art of being able to have a conversation with someone. Going out and spending time with your children gives you that opportunity to do just that. We as parents can give them the confidence and skills to hold a conversation.

 

Discussion Question

If your children are already adults, you can do with this your grandchildren. What are things that you want to do with your sons/daughters that will set a standard for them?

 

3 Ways to Prepare for Life Changes

We May Encounter Many Defeats But We Must Not Be Defeated.” – Maya Angelou

Welcome back to another school year!! My kids aren’t quite there yet, but if you spent anytime on Facebook recently you saw tons of back to school and first day of school pictures. How was your family prepared for the start of the school year? Is your family prepared for other life changes that may come?

Personal Experience

When my wife and I were looking into buying our home, we got a very important piece of advice. That advice was to look for a house that you can afford on one person’s income. Just in case, God forbid, that one person lose their job, you can still make the mortgage payments. We listened to that advice and a couple of years into living in our home, I was the one who lost my job. Because we listened and were prepared, my family didn’t lose our home.

How can we prepare for life changes? We don’t want to have “life happen” and then we’re scrambling trying to get resources together so that everything doesn’t fall apart.

How to Plan Ahead

  1. Practical Planning. This sounds boring, but it is probably the most important. We struggle with life changes because we’re not fully prepared for them. Dave Ramsey pushes having an emergency fund for this very reason. It will help you be prepared for the emergencies. Then they  no longer seem like emergencies to you.

Since the school year has started, this is a great time to plan out the year. If planning a year seems to daunting go by semester. What would make it a success? Is it a certain GPA? Getting volunteer opportunities. For younger children or it could be reading a certain number of books or focusing on an area to improve that was a struggle last year. Whatever the goal is, you want to prepare for this change and define what a successful school year would be.

      2. Overcome Obstacles. We know that the obstacles will come. How will you overcome them? Every new year we set new resolutions of habits, and life changes we want to make. Most people don’t see those changes last because when an obstacle comes up, the resolution gets dropped. Not because they didn’t want to change, but because they didn’t think about how they would overcome obstacles.

      3. Find an accountability group. Preparing for the unexpected life changes is one thing, it’s another to intentionally bring about a change. It’s great to have a goal of doing something. You won’t get it done by yourself though. You’re going to need an accountability partner or group. People that will push you when you don’t feel like getting up early or who will give you some encouragement when you’re feeling low. The people around you are just as important as the goal itself.

It’s the start of a new school year, are you prepared for the change? Are you prepared for life changes?

 

 

5 Things to Add to Your Morning Routine

Netflix & What Would’ve Been

Has this ever happened to you?If you’re like me, you have a “free day” marked on your calendar and you expect  to do whatever you need or want. However, the great plans that you had disappeared when you sit down to catch up on your Netflix queue. Before you know it, you’ve watched an entire season of Luke Cage, it’s 6 o’clock and you still haven’t showered!

Time w/ God

I like to get the most out of my day. I feel like it is a good day when at night I can look back and feel like I accomplished something. It’s a good feeling to have days where you feel productive. Productivity has a way of making you feel better in every area of your life.

Start the Right Way

One of the most important things that I’ve learned over the last couple of years is how important your morning routine is to the start of a great day. You can pretty much Google“How to have a great morning,” and get plenty of advice on how to get the most out of your day. What I see from these tips and morning routines are the biblical principles that God has laid out for us. So what does God say about how we are to start our day.

  1. Plan the night before

The start to a great day actually begins the night before. Proverbs 21:5 Says that “the plans of the diligent leads to abundance”. A successful day actually begins the day before. Too many times we just let the day happen to us. We need to plan how we want our days to look in advance.

  1. Devotional

Having a good devotional is a  benefit. Most devotionals give a daily scripture, some reflection and a prayer at the end. I really like devotionals because they offer a focus for the day. It provides context and gives me a reference for what I can refer to throughout the day. Joshua 1:8 says it best. We are to “meditate on God’s word day and night.” Devotionals are great for this.

  1. Pray

By this point in the morning routine, there you should flow from one thing to the next. It can be easy to flow from the devotional time to a time of personal prayer. For me, I like to begin my personal time with expressing to God how thankful I am. Our prayer time should focus on God rather than ourselves. While there are times we do need to express issues of our lives to God, there should also be times where we are praying for our families, friends and communities.

  1. Journal

I am a big fan of writing in a journal. For me, it’s a great way to reflect on the previous day, and a way to transfer the thoughts in my head out on paper. Sitting down to journal after a time of prayer is a great way of getting in the habit of writing the things down that God tells us. Using a journal as part of your morning routine helps to value God’s voice and His word.

  1. Confessions/Affirmations

Ending the morning routine with confessions or affirmations is an awesome way to build up our confidence and self-esteem before  we step into the world. God’s word is most powerful when we speak it out of our mouths. We don’t just become the things we see and hear, we become what we say. Confessing God’s word over lives builds us up for so many things that we attack during the day.

Have you developed a morning routine? If not, what is holding you back? Let’s start today with getting the most out of our days.